My Fortune

Yesterday I babysat for an eleven-year-old boy and a seven-year-old girl. It was a very fun job because we got to jaunt all over the city to various music lessons and we went out to dinner, etc. The following is the gem of the night.

Me and the girl picked up the boy from his after-school play practice. For some reason, he decided he would predict my future (claiming that it was for God that he was speaking). He revealed the following very grim fortune:

I would have a love (yes, this is how he put it), and he would love me back. But then he would get run over by a car.

Then I would have another love. I think me and this love would even get married. But then it would turn out that he is a lesbian (here he paused): a man lesbian.

At some point I was going to end up robbing a bank and getting shot in each leg 50 times and then spending time in prison and then joining a band of hubbubs...er, hobos (yes, he said hubbubs first).

Later the boy thought better of it and decided I would have a good fortune that would find me a billionaire and owning Australia.